This year has certainly put pressure on all of us and that includes our marriages. Many couples have found themselves in each other’s space, at home together 24/7 whilst trying to work and parent together. Couples who have previously had comfortable rhythms of togetherness and seperateness have found these rhythms disrupted by Covid19. Other couples barely see each other as they work in healthcare or essential services dealing with the increased demands placed on them at this time. So, it is not surprising that the statistics are showing an increase in marital conflict in 2020.
If you are experiencing marital conflict or reduced marital satisfaction you may be thinking about marriage counselling and you may have some questions. You may be wondering whether it can help and how. Below are just some of the ways in which marriage counselling can help.
- Doing conflict better – Most marriages experience conflict. Conflict itself is not a sign of a marriage in trouble. The problem is not whether there is conflict or not; rather it is how conflict is handled. Having a good marriage does not mean that you have to give up all your hopes, dreams, wants or rights to pursue peace at all costs. In fact conflict, if handled well, can lead to a greater understanding of each other and higher marital satisfaction. If handled poorly it can obviously lead to poorer marital satisfaction. So, learning how to do conflict well can be beneficial to most marriages.. How do you engage in disagreements and discussions without burning the marriage down? A marriage counselor can help both partners learn effective tools for doing conflict well.
- Communicating better – it would come as no surprise that communication breakdown does not facilitate a good marriage. In fact, a lack of communication is a clear sign that the marriage may be in trouble. When you no longer care to communicate you may be in a danger zone. Yet how do you communicate when you just can’t seem to get through to each other? You state something that seems pretty obvious to you, but your partner just doesn’t get it. Or your partner says something that you find hard to understand and he or she is confused by your response! A marriage counselor can help facilitate communication between you and your partner. This can lead to a rebuilding of trust, intimacy and overall marital satisfaction.
- Rebuilding the fun in the relationship – remember when you first met? You probably did lots of fun things together and had lots of laughs together. You probably had great moments, and moments that you remember to this day. Now in the humdrum of everyday life you may have even forgotten how to have fun together. Fun may seem like a distant memory never to be experienced again. Marriage counselling can help reconnect you with that sense of fun as a couple. It can help you to rediscover new ways of having fun together’ ways that fit in with your current responsibilities and life’s demands.
Our marriages have a significant impact on our general health and psychological wellbeing. There are understandably times when marriages undergo stress and strain. At such times a Marriage Counselor can help you work through those issues and come out having grown stronger and closer for it.